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User blog:TheAnonymous1/Nutaku Wars Short: X-mas in Aigis
A collection of short stories about the events during the yuletide season in the lands of MWA. Written with the fear of the prospect of my dick being burned by the other players if I don't (and the push from the bottle of red wine I got from my dad). Jolly Ol' Saint Conrad "Shh.....we need ta be discreet about this, lad." hushed Conrad as he looked down the chimney of his first house. "Sorry, boss. It's just that we never usually try to break into someone else's house if it wasn't to steal from 'em." spoke back Bergan apologetically. "Still, why do I have to wear this silly red nose and the antlers?" "It ain't my idea, boy. Mr. Prince Charmin' said you'd be my reindeer fer this task, whatever the blazes that means. An' if ya think ya got it bad, I'm 'ere dressed in this silly red robe an' wearin' an even sillier white beard." grunted the Bandit King. "Why'd we even agree ta this farce in the first place is beyond me." ... ... "Ya want us to do what?!" exclaimed Conrad. "I want you to be the Santa Claus for the surrounding villages of the Capital." repeated the Prince. Conrad had drawn the short end of the stick and got stuck to one of the communal jobs. "An' what makes ya think I'd even agree ta this 'ere set-up? I don't even have an idea of what a 'Santa Claws' does." "You just need to go into people's houses and deliver gifts to them, which we'll provide." stated Katie. "Shouldn't be a new concept to a barbarian like you." "Watch yer pretty mouth, lassie." threatened Conrad as he reached for his axe. "I might have ta keep part of it as a souvenir of sorts fer mahself otherwise." "Now, now. We just need to be calm about this. No need to escalate into violence in the castle, right?" said the Prince. "So yer basically tellin' me that I'm supposed ta do what I do best.....in the reverse order?" "He he~ I'd actually like to see him in a santa outfit." said Kerry. "Come now, Conrad." chuckled Cloris. "Why wouldn't you do it? I mean, you already have the right body type." "An' what's that supposed ta mean, wench?" "Everyone just calm down." the Prince spoke up. "Conrad, you're on Santa Duty this year. And do your duty, you will." "Yer gettin' too big fer yer britches, boy." growled Conrad. "My people may have agreed ta an alliance with ya arist'crats, but that ain't mean that we'll do yer biddin' fer ya." "Do it or so help me I will share the contents of your little......'novel' with the rest of the inhabitants of this castle." said the Prince. ".....Wha- Don't ya dare, lad. Yer threadin on some mighty thin ice 'ere...." responded Conrad. "What novel is this, Prince." asked Cloris. "Nothing you need to know....if Conrad does his job properly." replied the Prince. "Ooohhh~ juicy topics, huh? I like it!" said Cloris as she snickered. "Augh.....alright, alright! I'll be this 'Santa Claws' or whatever ya need me to be, but after this, I owe ya nothin' anymore. An' you'll give that back!" said Conrad, He realized that he can't squirm his way out of this. "Of course.....after you do your job." promised the Prince. Conrad stormed out of the meeting room, leaving the Prince and the others. "I wonder what he's so uptight about." mentioned Garrett. "Being Santa Claus for christmas should be an honor." "Well, you know Conrad." said Katie. "He doesn't like doing anything that doesn't benefit him in some way." "Ok. All of you, back to your tasks." announced the Prince. "It may be the Christmas season, but that doesn't mean we'll be lax about patrol duties and such. This meeting is ajourned." ... ... "Oh wait.....now I remember." muttered Conrad as he exited the house after leaving the gifts under the Christmas Tree inside. "Really? Tell me, boss!" said Bergan. "I-It ain't somethin' ya should concern yerself, lad!" stuttered the Bandit King. "Leave the worryin' ta me." "Sure, boss." replied Bergan. "Still, this household is weird. They'd leave a plate o' cookies an' a glass o' milk out on the table. Figured that it'd spoil like that so I took some cookies an' drank the milk." said Conrad. "An' this red suit 'ere is damn hard ta move in." "Boss, we should head out soon. We need to hit all the houses tonight." reminded Bergan. "Ugh. Ya know, why do we have ta do this alone when we have plenty o' people that can do this fer us? Call Mortimer an' the others. We'll need their help." ordered Conrad. "Yes boss. I'll ge-" Bergan didn't get to finish his sentence as a shout resounded the air around them. "Hey, you there! What do you think you're doing sneaking into other people's houses like that?!" barked Julian. Leo and another soldier were with him. "Ah, fer the love o' Aigis, we're just-" began Conrad as Julian pointed his sword at him. "Don't speak, theif. You're coming with us to the constable's office." "Bergan, run!" ordered Conrad as he made a dash towards the opposite direction of the soldiers. "Wait, come back here!" shouted Julian as he and his soldiers chased after the two. "Shit, boss. Why're they chasing us?! Shouldn't they know that we're doing this on the Prince's orders?" complained Bergan as they were running away. "Yer guess is as good as mine, lad." replied Conrad. "But somethin' tells me someone didn't tell 'em." "What do we do?" "Fer now, go and inform the others about the task at hand an' get the gift sack we left back. I'll distract 'em while the others get the other gifts ta the other houses." stated Conrad. "Yes, boss." The two parted ways as they came up an alley. ... ... Back in the castle.... "Mmm....this tea is really good!" exclaimed Katie.. "Of course it is." said Odette as she took another sip from her cup. "It's a recipe formed by my family's techniques in the arts of magic, after all." "....I see." said Katie as she smiled weakly. "Still, I can't help but feel like I forgot something. It's been nagging me for the last fifteen minutes." "Well, as my father used to say," mentioned Odette. "If you forgot about it, that just means that it wasn't that important." "Hmmm....you're probably right." replied Katie as she dismissed her worries and went back to drinking Odette's specialty tea. ... ... "Ahhh....it feels so good ta outsmart one of 'em pups from the Capital." sighed Conrad. "Good work on gatherin' up all these men, Bergan." "Well, once they heard the order came from you, Mortimer got 'em all serious-like. They divided the houses to be visited among the men and got to work." stated Bergan. "And with this many men going around other people's houses, those soldiers from the Capital can't keep up." "Still, almost all the houses hit within the span o' two hours is a great feat, lad. I'll buy ya all five cartloads of the kingdom's finest brew after all this." declared Conrad. "Hell, yeah, boss! Thanks." "Boss!" shouted Eunice as he came running. "All other houses....hit......One more....remaining." "Good on ya, mah boy." replied Conrad as he stroked his fake beard. "Tell the others ta pull out. I'm thinkin' me and Bergan 'ere should do this last 'un" "Understood......boss...." said Eunice as he walked away. "Alrighty then! Let's go an' hit this last house, eh Bergan?" "You're the boss, Boss." replied Bergan. Conrad began to climb into the chimney as Bergan stayed outside as lookout. ... ... "Hmm....this seems like a small house." Conrad muttered to himself. "There ain't even a proper kitchen 'ere." Conrad walked very silently as he made his way towards the small Christmas tree at the corner of the living room. There were small cookies and half a glass of milk on the table. "This has gotta be the sorriest Christmas tree I've ever had ta see, an' I haven't seen one of 'em before tonight." said Conrad as he reached the Christmas tree. "Small trinkets fer decorations an' a toy starfish fer a top ornament?" "....sorry it isn't too good-looking, Santa." Muttered a little girl coming down the stairs, rubbing her eyes from sleepiness. "W-What are ya on, lassie?!" stammered Conrad. "I ain't Santa. Yer just dreamin' this whole situation up!" "It....it really is you. It's you, Santa!" exclaimed the little girl as her eyes widened to the realization that Santa came to visit her house this Christmas season. "What're ya even doin' up this late, little girl?" inquired Conrad as he sighed. "I'm sure it's way past yer bedtime." "I was waiting for you, Santa." answered the little girl. "I thought that if I waited for you, I could ask you to grant my wish." "I-I guess that isn't out of the possibilities, lass." said Conrad, sitting down. "Alrighty then. What can good ol' Santa give ya? A teddy? A nice bracelet?" "I wish that my daddy can come home tonight." answered the little girl. ".....what? That's it? That's all ya want, little girl?!" asked Conrad, all confused. "Yes. That's all." "Ya know lassie, little girl like ya usually ask fer other things like teddies an' dollies, accordin' to mah sources. Why not ask fer the same thing?" "Well, my daddy works as a soldier in the Capital. And he's rarely home due to his work. He didn't even come to dinner." stated the little girl as she began to tear up. "Mommy's gone already and I had to eat Christmas eve dinner alone. Even if it's just for one night, I want daddy to come home. I want to sleep beside him while he reads me a bedtime story. Can you make my wish come true, Santa?" asked the little girl. However, Conrad was looking the other way. "Santa?" "I heard ya, lassie." muttered Conrad, sniffling. He didn't know what to do. In all his years of being a Bandit King, nothing like this has ever happened to him. "Don't worry, lassie. Tonight, I swear on mah name as Santa that yer daddy'll be comin' home." promised Conrad. "Really?!" "Does Santa ever go back on his word? Oh, an' have this, in the spirit of Christmas or whatever." said Conrad as he pulled out a teddy bear from his sack. "His name's Lancelot. He'll keep ya safe whenever ya find yerself alone on nights like this." "Wow! Thanks, Santa." said the little girl. "What's yer name, lassie?" asked Conrad. "It's Annabelle, but you can call me Anna." "Anna, eh? That's a nice name for a lass like ya." said Conrad as he smiled. "Well, I'd be off. Santa's got some deliverin ta do." "Thanks, Santa." said Annabelle. Conrad walked out of the front door to meet Bergan. "Nice going, boss. We finished up for tonight's ru-" said Bergan before being grabbed from behind and pushed against the wall. "You two have caused me insurmountable trouble, you know." stated Julian as he gritted his teeth. "Stay put, theif!" said Leo as he maintained his grip on Bergan's wrist. "Hey! Me an' this lad here were jus-" began Conrad. "Shut up! You don't get to speak!" barked Julian as he pointed his sword once more towards the Bandit King. "Don't trifle with me, boy. I won't take kindly ta any form o' threatening pointed towards mahself." growled Conrad as he pointed a Candy Cane towards Julian's sword. "Hahaha!" laughed Julian. "Does the prospect of spending the night in one of the cells during Christmas get to your heads?" "Ah, great. I left me axe when I wore this stupid robe." "Come quietly or-" said Julian before a cookie hit him square in the back of the head. "Hey!" shouted Annabelle from her house. "Leave Santa alone!" "What the heck are you talking about, kid?! Get back inside your house." ordered Julian. "Bergan, now!" shouted Conrad. Bergan took advantage of the confusion and got his arm free, hitting Leo with his elbow in the process. Conrad was able to throw the sword off of Julian's hand and gave him a good jab to the stomach. "Oof!" went Julian as he doubled over after he got all the wind knocked out of him. Bergan and Conrad managed to get away before Julian got back up. "Find them!" ordered Julian to the two soldiers with him. They ran after the two men dressed as a jolly old man and his reindeer. ... ... Bergan and Conrad hid behind a bush to lose the soldiers chasing after them. "Boss what are we doing here? We may have lost 'em now but we need to go before they pick up on us." suggested Bergan. "Quiet, lad." said Conrad as he looked back at Annabelle's house. Suddenly, Garrett came out of the corner and moved towards the house. "What in blazes is Garrett doin' 'ere?!" asked Conrad. "I dunno, boss." Garrett knocked on the door. A few seconds later, Annabelle came and opened it. "DADDY!!!" she shouted as she jumped to hug Garrett. "Hey, Anna. Daddy's home." said Garrett as he hugged Annabelle back. "What are you doing up so late?" "I was waiting for you, daddy." answered Annabelle. "Is that so? Well, you're lucky because they gave daddy tonight and tomorrow off." "I knew daddy would come home. Santa promised me." she said. "Santa?" asked Garrett. "Yeah! Santa came to our house a while ago and promised me that you'd come home." said Annabelle as she giggled. "He even had a funny accent." "Santa, huh?" muttered Garrett, realizing that it was probably Conrad. He looked up the sky, smiling. "Well thanks, Santa!" "Daddy, can you read me a story before bed?" asked Annabelle. "Sure!" answered Garrett. "We'll even go wherever you want tomorrow." "Yay! I wanna go to the beach, then!" "A beach?! Well honey, a beach is kinda....." Garrett's voice trailed off as they went back inside the house. "Wow, Who knew Garrett had a kid, right, Boss?" said Bergan. "..." ".....Boss, are you crying?" "What?! No!" exclaimed Conrad as he wiped a tear from his eye. "We better move, lad." he said. "The next village still needs ta get their gifts. Tell the others." "Wow, boss. You sure are fired up for this." "Of course I'm fired up, boy. Conrad always does the job given to 'im seriously. That's how I became the Bandit King." "Really?" asked Bergan. "Well, no. I just punched the other guy an' his teeth fell out. Pretty sure he ain't got a girlfriend after that. Then they made me King." "That's even more badass, Boss!" "Ya bet it does! Now, let's get movin' right now. We have other houses ta hit in the other village." "Yes, boss!" The Bandit King and his minion went away and disappeared into the night. The gift of the Cloris "Are you sure we should be doing this?" asked Adele, holding tightly to her hat. "Of course we should be doing this!" answered Cloris. "This is what YOU want after all, right?" "Well yeah, but isn't this a bit too risky?" The two witches have snuck into the Prince's bedchambers for one purpose and one purpose alone: Boxers. The sound of the shower pouring from inside the bathroom was audible enough to be heard from outside the room. "Why couldn't we do this when the prince WASN'T in his room?" said Adele. "Because you were too chickenshit to do it a while ago, and the laundry will be done first thing tomorrow morning. That means there's an entire hamper's supply of our sweet Prince's dirty clothes in there that'll only last until the maids take 'em to the washing area." "Well, I'm sorry, but I wasn't about to do something so...lewd in broad daylight." said Adele, frowning. "There you go again," Cloris rolled her eyes. "You always come up with a stupid excuse NOT to do whatever you set your mind to, that's why you never really get what you want without me having to help." "Well....that's....." "Tell me, Adele: What did we come here for?" asked Cloris. ".....Boxers." "And when are we getting 'em?" ".....now." "Say it loude- oh wait, nevermind. that probably isn't a good idea." Cloris quietly opened the door to the Prince's bedchambers, checking first that he was still in the bathroom. "All right. Coast is clear, chickenshit." she whispered. "Don't call me that!" snapped Adele. "I'll stop calling you chickenshit when you DO stop being chickenshit." Cloris retorted. "Okay, okay. I'll stop being chickenshit. Can we go back to stealing the Prince's underwear?" "Well....as long as you acknowledge that you're chickenshit....." muttered Cloris. As they approached the hamper, Adele froze. "Um....I think we shouldn't be doing this after all...." she said sheepishly. "Oh brother." sighed Cloris. "This is why it's hard to get you to do things. I thought you were gonna stop being chickenshit?" "Well, I just thought that we shouldn't do something so......dangerous." responded Adele. "The only dangerous thing here is my hand about to bitchslap you so hard in the face if you don't stop whining." growled Cloris. "But-" "No buts!" hissed Cloris as she grabbed Adele's face and pulled her closer. "Tell me: Do you think the Prince's used boxers are worth it?" "Well......" began Adele. "Well what?!" interrogated Cloris. "....yes." "And do you think that I'd have risked getting caught with you if I didn't think the same thing?" "Cloris....." As Cloris reached for the hamper's cover and opened it, an angels' choir could be heard singing hallelujah. "As my folks used to say: Carpe Diem. Seize the underpants." said Cloris with glimmering eyes. "Uh...I'm pretty sure that that's not what it-" "Shh! Don't contradict me in my moment of charismatic posing." "Uhh....okay." muttered Adele. "Now," said Cloris as she handed Adele the first boxer briefs her hands laid upon, "touch it." "Yes!" ansered Adele, her hands shaking. "Smell it!" ordered Cloris. Adele put the briefs on her face and took a deep whiff. It smelled musty and damp, but that's exactly what she was looking for. "Do you see, Adele? Do you-" "What the hell are you two doing in my room?!" shouted the Prince, his bottom half covered in a towel. "Prince!" exclaimed Cloris. "We didn't expect you to come out so-" "Soon? I probably would have, if you two didn't talk so loudly." growled the Prince as he gave both witches a firm flick to the forehead. "Ow!" said Cloris. "Ouch!" said Adele. "So, I'll ask again: what the hell were you two doing?" asked the Prince. "We were sneaking in to your room to obtain some fresh underwear." responded Adele. "Obviously." said the Prince, rolling his eyes. "Honestly, you two are THE WORST underwear thieves in the entire Capital. Even though you probably are the only ones that are such." he muttered. "We know." both witches said simultaneously. "And do you have anything to say for yourselves?" "They smelled wondrous!" both witches again answered simultaneously. If people's auras could kill, Cloris and Adele would have been dead the moment the Prince got out of the shower. He looked as if he was ready to pop a vein. "Wrong answer." said the Prince, glowering at both of them. It is said that that was the last anyone had heard from the two witches that night. Rumors say they were banished into the castle's dungeon for the entire night. The Holiday Ex-change (coming to the North Pole sometime in April): Part 1 "Alright, everyone settle down." announced the Prince, like a day-care teacher calling her students. And just like two-year-olds, everyone obeyed and sat down on the chairs of the recreation room. "It's about time to commence the exchanging of gifts." he said. "Yaayy!!" cried everyone in unison. "You know, I don't really need your collective sarcasm this night....." grunted the Prince. "Well, we just wanted to humor you." began Daniela, fixing the chest area of the one-piece dress she specifically saved for this occasion. "I mean, we ARE doing this whole secret santa thing like high-schoolers, might as well go straight home after this and cheer about the christmas vacation and complain about the holiday homework, right?" "Dang, did you work hard for that retort, woman." said Cuterie, chuckling. "Ughh!!" groaned the Prince. "We jest, my Prince." assured Gellius. "We're all honored to be part of this joyous occasion." "Thank you, Gellius, my man." sighed the Prince. "Anyway, since this was mostly Deine's idea, I think it's fair that she starts first, then the rest will go in a clockwise manner." "Uh, okay." said Deine, rising from her chair. "Well, I drew Gellius, my second-in-command." Turning to Gellius, she handed him a small box enclosed by a red bow. "Merry Christmas, Gellius. Please accept my gratitude for being a good subordinate." she said. "Wow. Thank you, ma'am." said Gellius, slightly embarrased. He fidgeted with the small box in his hand. "Well, aren't you gonna open it?" asked Katie. "Huh- oh right!" said Gellius. He took off the bow and opened the box, revealing a small cross necklace. "I'd give you a pair of earrings instead since I thought it might look good on you," said Deine, "but since it wouldn't be proper decorum for you to wear them on the battlefield, I went with this since you can hide it under your clothes and armor." "I...I don't know what to say...." said Gellius "You don't have to say anything." said Deine, smiling. "Your thanks before is enough." With that, Deine sat down. "Alright! Who's next?" she asked. Everyone looked at the two empty seats that was meant for people who weren't there. "Unfortunately, it seems that Miss Adele and Miss Cloris could not attend this event." announced Anna. "With GOOD REASON!" groaned the Prince. "You locked 'em in the dungeon, didn't you?" said Cuterie. "They were sneaking around in MY room." grumbled the Prince. "But it's christmas eve!!" exclaimed Katie. "I know, I know." said the Prince. "I'm not a heartless leader, so I ordered Crave to let them out at midnight." "Luckily, I checked on everyone's draw, and they got each other." announced Anna. ... ... "I know we aren't getting out of this till midnight, but what did you get me?" asked Adele. "Do you remember how one of the compartments in the Prince's clothes drawer was missing a few days ago?" asked Cloris. "Yeah." "Well, I'm the one who took it, and so I got you an entire drawer compartment's worth of the Prince's underwear.....although they weren't used." sighed Cloris. "It's not that easy to bribe the maids who do the laundry and.....Adele?" Adele was in a state of awe, her mouth agape. "Do you mean that?!" asked Adele with her eyes widened. "Well...yeah. But it isn't used." said Cloris. "That doesn't matter. Thanks!" exclaimed Adele. "You're welcome. By the way, what did YOU get me?" asked Cloris. "Well, I didn't know what you wanted, and I couldn't give you any potions since you already come to me for that on a bi-weekly basis." said Adele. "Oh." "....and because the rest are for my use only....." Adele muttered under her breath. "What was that last bit?" inquired Cloris. "N-Nothing!" answered Adele. "Anyway, I got you a lingerie set." "Wow!" said Cloris. "What color?" "Well, you always wear white clothes." said Adele. "I know, sweetie." said Cloris, rolling her eyes. "It's in the title." "I-I know that!" hissed Adele. "So I thought it would be best to get you a different color, that's why I went with pink." "Ooohhh~" wooed Cloris. "That'd look so sexy on me!" "Well, I'm glad you like it." said Adele. Cloris seemed to go nearer to Adele, but fell flat on her face. "Uhh.....what are you doing?" asked Adele. "I was gonna give you a hug, but then I was reminded by the floor that we were locked up in straightjackets." groaned Cloris. "Well, at least the feeling's there." said Adele, smiling wryly. "Why can't midnight come sooner?!" yelled Cloris. Outside, Crave was making a very irritated face. "Man, why do I get the shittier posts during holidays?" he grumbled. ... ... "Well, I'm sure they're fine." assured Anna. "Anyway, let's move on to the next one." said the Prince, looking at Gellius. "Right." said Gellius, standing from his seat. "My gift is for Miss Cuterie." He handed her a neatly wrapped box. "Merry Christmas." he said, trying his best to give a faint smile. "Oh gee! Thanks, big guy!" said Cuterie. "Uh, it's Gellius." "Whatever!" barked Cuterie as she ripped up the wrapper and opened the box. "It's a...." she began, taking out a large, black hat. "....a top hat?" "W-Well, during the times when I see you walking within the Capital, you seemed to have a penchant for head accessories, so I asked the shopkeeper what would be a good present for a friend like yourself, and he suggested that which is in your hands now." said Gellius. "Wait. I'm your friend?" asked Cuterie. "I-I mean, if it bothers you to be my friend, I can always keep my distance...." said Gellius dejectedly. "No! On the contrary!" smiled Cuterie. She fiddled with the top hat, placing it on her head. "Wow! I feel like one of them important people! Maybe I'll get a monocle and wear it with this instead of my usual outfit." she joked. "That'll be a sight." said Daniela, smirking. "Well, I do wish to stay, but I would like to ask the Prince permission to leave." announced Gellius. "What? Why?" asked Cuterie. "Well, I need to inspect the armory and make sure all swords, spears, shields, etc. are accounted for." he said. "Oh crap, was it your turn?" asked Deine. "Shit! I'm sorry, Gellius. If I knew, I would've rescheduled-" "It's okay, ma'am. I'm happy to know that I'm doing something to better protect this castle and its kingdom." said Gellius. "Oh, how noble of you!" said Daniela. "You might just make me blush." "I-I-I'm just doing my job!" stammered Gellius. "Hahaha! Relax, big guy. I was just joking." said Daniela as she laughed. "A-Anyway, I'll be going first!" said Gellius as he turned around and left. "Gee....he was a bit uptight." said Daniela. "That's because you were embarrassing him." sneered Deine. "I know, I know." said Daniela. "I'm sorry." And so the silent night continued. of part 1 The Holiday Ex-change: Part 2 "All right. Next!" said Katie. "It seems that it is my turn." announced Odette as she stood up. "My assigned person would be Miss Katie." "Huh- oh, really?" said Katie, bewildered. "Yes." replied Odette bluntly. She took out a pendant and handed it to Katie. "Here." "Oh, uhh....thanks?" said Katie. "What is it?" "I took the liberty of taking several of Miss Adele's concoctions and combined it with my magic prowess, sealing the result in this pendant that should let the wearer maintain a youthful appearance." said Odette proudly. "Wait a minute." said Katie, furrowing her eyebrows. "What is it? Isn't it grand?" said Odette, puffing her chest. "Are you saying I look old?" asked Katie. "Wha- no! I mean, you looked stressed recently and my family always taught me that stress causes one to grow wrinkles and I just thought you might need something like this and...."stammered Odette erratically before she grew quiet. "I'm sorry. I should have been more thoughtful with regards to gift-giving. I can take it back and-" "No, no! I'm actually happy for this!" assured Katie, smiling. "Thank you." "W-well, I knew you would enjoy it!" said Odette, trying to act proud and hide her flustered face. "He he. You look kinda cute when you're embarrassed." mentioned the Prince, chuckling. That comment drew glares from the other ladies in the room towards both the Prince and Odette. "A-Anyway, whose turn is it?!" shouted Odette, embarrassed. Everyone looked at another empty chair. "Hmmm....." muttered Katie. "It seems that Cecily is UNSURPRISINGLY not attending this gathering." "Well, with her line of work, I wouldn't blame her." said the Prince. "Worry not!" Anna piped up. "She has delivered her present to my office before she left. It is adressed to Miss Daniela." "Oh, is that so?" said Daniela, looking surprised. "Here you go." said Anna as she handed Daniela a wrapped present bigger than one of her tits. "Hmmm, it's surprisingly heavy.' said Daniela as she opened her gift. "I wonder what it is..." She took of the box's cover to reveal a large metal pail. "....A bucket?" she asked. "That's strange no matter how you look at it." mentioned Cuterie. "It came with a note." said Anna, holding up a small envelope. "Well why didn't you say so, toots?" said Daniela as she snatched the envelope from Anna's hand and opened it. ... ... Meanwhile, just outside the Bandits' hideout. "....Fufufufu~" chuckled Cecily as she took a bite from the piece of ham given to her by the bandits while she sat beside the campfire. "What's gotten into you, missy?" asked Mortimer without looking away from the piece of steak he was eating. "You lookin' like one of 'em crazy people, laughin' like that for no reason." "Oh nothing. It's just about time for one of my friends to receive her suprise." "Hehe. I like givin' other folks surprises." said Mortimer. "Though it'd be involvin' a club to the back of their heads." "Didn't you say Conrad had a task for you lot?" asked Cecily as she raised one of her eyebrows. "I did my part. I'll let 'em other boys do the rest. 's ain't my problem no more." replied Mortimer before he went back to chewing his steak. "Hooooh?~" Cecily laid her eyes on the campfire. "Just thinking about the face she's making right now gives me so much sense of accomplishment." "You say somethin'?" asked Mortimer. "I was just talking to myself." dismissed Cecily, smiling in anticipation of the reaction Daniela would give. ... ... Daniela opened the note sealed inside the envelope and read it out loud. Daniela, Thanks for not getting in the way of my job for the past year. Here's a milk bucket. If you're wondering where the milk is, it's in your tits. Figured that those cow udders must be keeping you from performing properly in the battlefield. That's why I got one of the buckets from the farmers just outside of town for you. Just ask one of 'em farmers to milk you. I'm sure that they'll be more than happy to do so if you ask them and there'll be more milk in town for everyone. Who knows, you might even get some 'action' with one of their bulls while you're at it, if you know what I mean ;) It's a win-win situation. Love, Cecily. "Oh.....uh....I guess that was.....nice of her?" uttered Anna, looking away. "I'm gonna kill that bitch the next time I see her." growled Daniela as she gritted her teeth. The veins on her forehead were visibly showing while she crumpled the note in her hands. "Well, she sure got a good sense of humor." said Cuterie. "Her gift and her curse." said Daniela. "That reminds me. I drew her for my exchange gift. Excuse me while I prepare her deathbed for her." With that, Daniela stormed out of the room. "What is it that they say in situations like this?" asked Katie. "You can dish it out, but you can't take it?" "W-Well, let's move on." said the Prince. "Okay! Next is-" Before he finished his sentence, Julian burst through the doors, huffing and puffing. "Hah....haah......sorry I'm late....everyone...." he wheezed, still panting with his hands to his knees. "Whoa. You sure do know how to make an entrance." mentioned Ada. "I had urgent matters to attend to!" Julian snapped back. "Well, urgent or not, we're glad you made it just in time." said the Prince. "Well? Where's your gift?" "Oh right....um...." Julian approached Odette and handed her a card. "Merry Christmas." Odette furrowed her eyebrows as she read the card. "One coupon to grant one wish?" "A labor coupon?" Katie leered at Julian. "What are you, ten?" "I didn't know what sorcerers liked, okay?!" barked Julian. "No, no. This is actually what I require." said Odette. "As I shall be returning to my humble abode tomorrow night, I will need someone to carry my bags. You will do so, Julian." "Oh, uhh...okay. Tomorrow night, then." said Julian. He then turned to the Prince. "Prince, may I be excused early?" "What? Why?" asked the Prince. "I'm beat. I had to chase some burglar dressed in red robes around town the entire night as I was heading here." replied Julian. Anna and the Prince looked back at Katie, who was sweating profusely at this point. "W-W-Wow, that's u-u-unfortunate.. R-Right, Julian?" stammered Katie, not looking up from her lap. "Anyway, I need to rest. So with your permission, I'd like to take my leave." said Julian. "All right, Get some rest, Commander." said the Prince as he gestured him to leave. Julian then turned back and stumbled out of the room. "..." "You didn't tell Julian?" asked Anna. "I-I didn't know! I told the proper people and they should have passed it down to the chain-of-command. They must have missed Julian." said Katie. "Well, we'll discuss the punishment for your failure tomorrow morning when Julian wakes up." said the Prince. "....I'm sorry." said Katie, bowing her head. "Well, we can't let this scenario stop this event." said Deine "R-Right. Next!" said the Prince. "It's my turn!" said Ada as she practically hopped up from her seat. She handed Anna a large salmon wrapped in a red bow. "Merry Christmas, miss Anna!" "It's a.....salmon..." muttered Anna, forcing a smile. "In my culture, it's a peace offering signifying the intention of being friends." told Ada. "And you did not take the liberty of packaging it properly?" inquired Odette. "Y-You're one to talk!" snapped Ada. "It's hard to wrap anything with beastwoman hands!" "W-Well, I appreciate the thought, Miss Ada." said Anna, still trying to force a smile. "You're welcome!" replied Ada, smiling. She went back to her seat and sat down. "I guess it's my turn." said Cuterie. "I got Ada." She went to Ada's seat and handed her a ball of yarn. "Merry Christmas, Ada!" "....yarn?" muttered Ada. "What? Isn't that what cats like?" asked Cuterie. "You humans are so stupid." said Ada, visibly annoyed. "Just because I'm a beastwoman, doesn't mean that-" Cuterie threw the ball of yarn out of the window with a blank expression. "Nyaa!" shouted Ada as she chased after the yarn. "..." "..." The whole room remained silent. "See? I told you!" Cuterie finally spoke up. "That's dangerous! This is the second floor!" exclaimed Deine. "So what?" asked Cuterie. "Cats will always land on their feet." "You really think of her as a cat, don't you?" asked Katie. "Oh all right. I'll go make sure she's okay." said Cuterie as she went towards the window. "Hey wai-" said Katie, but she was too late. Cuterie had already jumped out of the same window Ada had exited from. "She's too reckless for her own good." said Deine. "Well, what can you do?" joked the Prince. "Now, onto the last person..." he said as everyone looked at the last empty seat. "Garrett has been given the night and tomorrow's day off." announced Anna. "You gave him a day and night off?" asked Odette. "Well, his daughter surely couldn't spend the night of christmas alone, right?" replied the Prince. "Well, I guess you are not wrong there." said Odette. "Don't worry. He gave me his gift before he left. It's adressed to you, my Prince." "Oh! Well, okay." said the Prince as he was handed a small box. He opened it to reveal a small dagger with intricate symbols carved on the hilt. "It comes with a note." said Anna, handing him a letter. "Lemme see." said the Prince, opening the letter. The Prince Thank you for giving me purpose in my life. I present to you this dagger. It was given to me by my father and defended me in my rough childhood from wild animals and other people who sought to inflict harm to me. I think that you, of all people, should take it, since you saved me from myself. Thank you and Merry Christmas. From: Garrett PS: Thank you for giving me tonight and tomorrow off so that I could spend time with my daughter.] "Oh my. That was extremely heartfelt of him." said Odette, wiping a tear from her left eye. "Well yeah." said the Prince, smiling. He looked up and remembered Garrett "I hope our friendship lasts beyond this lifetime, Garrett." "You know he can't hear you, right?" said Katie. "I know that!" barked the Prince "I was having a moment. Don't you sass me!" "Well, I guess that it's about time for everyone to go back to their rooms." said Anna. "After one more round." said the Prince, raising his glass of wine. "Merry Christmas, everyone!" "Merry Christmas!" shouted everyone in the room. Once they finished their wine, everyone began to leave. "Wait, Prince." said Anna. She grabbed the Prince's sleeve as he was leaving the room. "What is it, Anna?" asked the Prince. "Well, since everyone left already, I thought that I should give you MY gift." she said, fidgeting with her hands. "Wait, so two people drew me?" "I-It seems so." replied Anna. "Well, I'd love to receive a gift from you." said the Prince, patting her head. "Really?" said Anna, looking up to his face. "Sure!" replied the Prince. "So where is it?" Anna looked down and her smile turned sinister. "I already gave it to you." Suddenly, the Prince's knees felt weak. "What the-?" He stumbled back, unable to control his legs. Anna looked down on the Prince and straddled him. "I drugged your wine. It's both a neurotoxin that paralyzes your motor functions as well as an aphrodisiac." explained Anna, her expression dark. "I....wha..." the Prince tried to speak, but all that left his lips was gibberish. Anna ran her hands down the Prince's chest, down to his stomach, and onto his now-hardened member. "You know, ever since I became your secretary, i always admired you." she said as she took out his dick. "I took secret glances at you when you weren't looking. But you never really looked back at me. You kept flirting with other girls." The Prince tried to squirm, but he was paralyzed. "You were flirting with one of them a while ago, and I just couldn't take it anymore. Don't worry, though. I won't hurt you. The drug only lasts for six hours." she assured the Prince. She stood up and took off her underwear, revealing her dripping pussy. "Look, Prince. Look at how my womanhood longs for you. Even if it's just for tonight, make love to Anna." she said, slowly lowering her waist. "Mmmph...ghh......" uttered the Prince, but he was barely able to form words at this point. "Don't worry, my Prince. You probably won't remember any of this tomorrow morning." said Anna as the head of the Prince's dick touched the lips of her pussy. The events that followed never reached the ears of anyone else but Anna and the Prince. They say that he was just found in the room the next morning, dehydrated. The Prince himself never remembered what happened. Anna was surprisingly chipper that morning. Since the other events were partially erased from the Prince's memories, he was not able to give Katie her punishment for failing to inform Julian of Conrad's assignment. Katie incidentally gave him a pen because she drew him but he left before she could give it to him. Epilogue "You know, I never got a gift last night." mentioned Deine as she was eating pancakes from the breakfast table. "You mean no one drew your name?" asked Gellius, who was drinking orange juice. "I guess so. And the whole exchange gift thing was partly my idea, too." she replied. Anna was passing by when she overheard this conversation. That's why there were two Prince draws. I forgot to write Deine. Well no harm, no foul, right? she thought to herself as she quietly continued walking away. "Still, that's sad, not getting a present like that when everyone else did." said Gellius. "Meh. It doesn't matter." said Deine before putting another slice of pancake in her mouth. "I mean, getting to see the looks on your faces when you all got yours was a enough of a present." "You know, you ought to think more about your own happiness, ma'am." said Gellius. "Yeah, you're right." replied Deine. "That's why I was thinking of being there to give the Prince a good wake-up when he finally comes to." "Wait. You ARE talking about a normal wake-up, right?" Gellius asked as he raised an eyebrow. "Oh, who knows...." replied Deine with a very faint and sinister smirk. "W-Well, don't push yourself too hard....." muttered Gellius as he took another sip of his juice. "Oh, I won't be the one getting pushed too hard, if you know what I mean." said Deine, blushing wildly. "Sometimes I question whether I'm your subordinate or your diary..." said Gellius facepalming. "Or both." They ended this conversation and went back to silently eating their breakfast. God have mercy on the Prince's soul......and dick. Category:Blog posts